It can be said that there is no pain like grief, whether it be a loved one or a career. Of course, the pain of a lost career is significantly less than a loved one, but it hurts nonetheless. Adding to my misery on several levels was being offered the option of hourly work as a contractor consultant. That would seem like a positive, and it was financially, but I watched as everyone else was sent packing. Further, since the company was divesting itself of all its assets, I got to participate in the “garage sale” of equipment I had labored to acquire and configure into something that kept the company solvent. All that hard work was lost; worse, all those careers were jettisoned because of a funding cut.
Before the office door clicked shut for the last time and I ended my career as a full-time salaried worker, I entered the quantum reality of self-employment. I stuck around the old office to monitor the last of the assets being bought and hauled away by those with futures much brighter than my own. Some six years later, I continue to fight the self-employment battle. I’d love to find full-time work, but the work environment has changed. People my age are being shown the exits, not the entrance. Experience is not worth paper certificates. I’ve been told my degree means nothing because technology has changed. Work ethic can’t compete against low wages.
However, I try to stay positive, keep up with trends, and seek knowledge from the fire-hose of information that is today’s Internet. As long as I can stay ahead of the train of mental and physical obsolescence, I still see a future of possibilities, not regrets. Does that make me deluded? Perhaps, but I leave “dining on ashes” to those who have stopped living.
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